Sesshoumaru's day off
by shojowindy
Summary: Sesshoumaru decides to take a rest from being evil but can't resist the temptation
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: hello all, shojowindy here and this is my first fan fic ever I  
hope you all like it. Also I don't own Inuyasha, it belongs to Rumiko  
Takahashi. This story is called the unseen weirdness.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
Sesshomaru was walking around in the feudal area trying to figure out what to do. And with him were Rin and Jaken. (Sesshomaru will be known as sess for the remainder of this fic.)  
  
Sess: I'm so damn bored, the one day that I decide to not be evil and it turns out boring!  
  
Jaken: why my lord, you could go search for your brother Inuyasha, maybe today you can trick him out of the Tetsaiga.  
  
Sess:hmm... it's tempting I could pretend to be nice than steal the Katana from that hanyou when he least expects it. Yes lets go find that baka hanyou, Mwhahahahahahahah!!!!!  
  
Rin: O_o my lord why are you laughing evilly so?  
  
Sess: (stops laughing ) oh it's nothing, come we must find that hanyou and his friends.  
  
( Sess and his gang start to search for Inuyasha, so we turn to where InuYasha is)  
  
Inuyasha: come on aren't you ready yet, I'm friggin' hungry!  
  
Kagome: can't you even wait a few minutes?  
  
Inuyasha: no, I want my food now woman!  
  
Kagome: INUYASHA, SIT!!!  
  
Inuyasha: @_@  
  
Miroku & Sango: finally you shut him up.  
  
Kagome: dammit, InuYasha can be so immature sometimes.  
  
Sango: I know what you mean, Miroku has no respect either, he's always trying to grab my ass of course he always gets beaten up for it.  
  
Inuyasha: (finally becomes conscious ) dammit, kagome why'd you do that ?  
  
Kagome: because you needed it!  
  
Miroku: the foods ready, ooh, it looks delicious!  
  
Inuyasha: oh yeah, it's Ramen time!  
  
( Sess and gang find Inuyasha)  
  
Rin: hello, my lord wanted to see you guys. ^_^  
  
Sango: o_O Sesshomaru, why are you here?  
  
Inuyasha: yeah, why in the hell are you here, you're not taking my Katana!  
  
Sess: oh that's all in the past I want to become friends. ( smiles evilly )  
  
Kagome: you're kinda weird.  
  
Sess: I'm not weird I'm just misunderstood.  
  
All except Sess: ...sure  
  
Sess: so what's for lunch? I'm real hungry.  
  
Inuyasha: you're not eating any of my Ramen!  
  
Sango: who made you the Ramen king?  
  
Miroku: I did  
  
All except Miroku: O_o  
  
Sess: okay, I think I'll just go over here.( sess zooms ten feet away)  
  
Kagome: anyways, lets just eat.  
  
(everyone starts stuffing their faces with ramen and Jaken moves toward the food)  
  
Sango: eww, icky bumpy froggy thing! (she pummels Jaken with her boomerang)  
  
Jaken: @_@  
  
Kagome: why do you travel with a icky bumpy froggy thing anyways?  
  
Sess: He's only useful for doing low-level work and watching Rin.  
  
Rin: but my lord, don't you play dolls with him? Sess: (_( I do not do such things! ( tries to hide embarrassment )  
  
All except Sess and Rin: BWHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
( Inuyasha is laughing so hard he spews his ramen all over Miroku)  
  
Miroku: EWW GROSS!  
  
Inuyasha: HAHAHA! MY BROTHER LIKES TO PLAY WITH DOLLS!  
  
Sess: *_* Stop laughing at me! ( he starts to cry )  
  
(All except Inuyasha stop laughing.)  
  
Kagome: stop laughing Inuyasha!  
  
Inuyasha: I (laugh) can't.  
  
Kagome: Inuyasha, SIT!  
  
Inuyasha: @_@  
  
Sess: ( stops crying) okay I'm fine now. ^____^  
  
All except Sess: O_O  
  
Miroku: (is cleaning off robes)  
  
Hey, this is the end of my first chappy. Sorry it's a cliffhanger but I need an idea on what they should do next and if I should add more characters. Please review my story, anything you comment is fine with me. Until next time.  
  
~Owari~ 


	2. chapter 2

Disclaimer:hello again people I'll try to do a funny chapter for you all that you'll like. I hope you liked my last chapter. Also I don't own inuyasha, it's pretty obvious I don't. so on with the story, yah!  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Kagome: anyways, let's talk about something else.  
  
Shippo: hello guys, what have you been doing?  
  
Sango: nothing much shippo just eating ramen with sess.  
  
Shippo: huh, what's sess doing here?  
  
Sess: ( mwhahaha! they'll never realize why I'm really here!) I just wanted to hang out with my brother, isn't that right jaken?  
  
Jaken: why I thought you wanted to steal the tets( sess throughs a rock at jaken) @_@  
  
All except sess: O_o  
  
Sess: jaken doesn't know what he's saying, he probably have a concusion.  
  
Rin: ( rin starts playing with shippo's tail) hey this tail is really fluffy!  
  
Shippo: hey stop touching my tail!  
  
Rin: your tail isn't as fluffy as sesshoumaru's though...  
  
Sess: that's right, I have the fluffiest tail in the world.  
  
All except sess: O_O  
  
Inuyasha: ( wakes up) hey you may have a fluffier tail, but I have the better sword!  
  
Sess: you do not, my sword the tokijin is better!  
  
Inuyasha: is not!  
  
Sess: is too!  
  
Inuyasha: is not!!  
  
Sess: is too!!  
  
Kagome: stop fighting!  
  
Inuyasha: is not!!!  
  
Sess: is too!!!  
  
Miroku: I believe you will have to force them to stop kagome.  
  
Inuyasha: is not!!!!  
  
Sess: is too!!!!  
  
Sango: yes, please do  
  
Kagome: INUYASHA SIT!!  
  
Inuyasha: @_@  
  
Sess: hahaha, you have to obey a woman!  
  
Shippo: anyways, this is pretty weird. Hey ramen, my favorite. ( starts chowing down ramen)  
  
Miroku: so kagome, what were we going to do after lunch?  
  
Kagome: well, we can have some kind of contest.  
  
Sango: what kind of contest should we have?  
  
Rin: I know, let's have a hair contest, sesshoumaru has the softest and longest hair.  
  
All: O_O  
  
Sess: ( sess tries to hide embarrasment ) yeah that's true.  
  
Kagome: okay I guess we can see who has the best hair.  
  
Inuyasha: oh, that's something I can beat you at  
  
Miroku: okay so there's no point in me entering, my hair barely fits in a pony tail.  
  
Sango: so very true.  
  
Miroku: so the contestants are sess, inuyasha, kagome, sango, and rin.  
  
Sess: alright lets get started, I shampoo and condition my hair everyday and use the best hair products. I'm sure to win!  
  
Miroku: alright, me and shippo will be the judges.  
  
Inuyasha: my hair's better than yours, who can resist nice white hair like mine?  
  
Kagome: inuyasha, I hate to say it but your white hair makes you look old.  
  
Inuyasha: what, how can you say that, no it doesn't!  
  
All except inuyasha start laughing  
  
Inuyasha: *__* hey stop laughing at me!  
  
Sess: haha, now you know what it's like to get laughed at.  
  
Miroku: inuyasha, you're such an idiot.  
  
Inuyasha: ( punches miroku and knocks him out ) I'M NOT AN IDIOT!  
  
All stop laughing  
  
Sess: well now that was fun, now we see that inuyasha does not have the hair to win.  
  
Sango: well, I don't think I have the best hair either, it has too much blood from the demons I slayed.  
  
Sess: haha, your hair has blood in it!  
  
Kagome: stop being so mean to everyone or we'll kick you out sess.  
  
Sess: oh sorry, I'll stop now.  
  
Shippo: (still eating ramen)  
  
Inuyasha: hey shippo you better not be eating my ramen!  
  
Shippo: uh-oh! Better go!  
  
Inuyasha: hey get back here you little thief! Who said you can have ramen anyways?  
  
Shippo: (turns into pink thing and flies away) haha, inuyasha you can't catch me!  
  
Inuyasha: shippo, when I get you I'm going to pound you into the ground.  
  
Rin: hey, that's pretty pink!  
  
Sess: isn't it rin? Pink is such a beautiful color. ^___^  
  
All: O_O ( they start laughing )  
  
Sess: you're all mean! *_* ( he start's crying )  
  
Inuyasha: hahaha, another girly thing my brother does. Are you sure you're not gay?  
  
Sess: I'm not gay, I just like playing with dolls and pink. Is there something wrong with that?  
  
Kagome: well, inuyasha does have a point, that does sound like a homosexual.  
  
Miroku: yeah sess does act kinda weird also.  
  
Sess: I'M NOT GAY!!  
  
Sango: okay you're not gay, but you do act like you're gay.  
  
Inuyasha: if you're not gay than have you ever had a girlfriend?  
  
Sess: of course I have! In kindergarten.  
  
All: hahahaha!!  
  
Rin: what's a homosexual?  
  
Sess: it's nothing you need to worry about rin.  
  
Inuyasha: you're too protective sess, you need to let the girl know more about the world.  
  
Kagome: why do you have a little girl traveling with you anyway?  
  
Sess: umm, she wouldn't stop following me.  
  
Jaken: that is not true my lord, you dumped me for her.  
  
All: hahahaha  
  
Inuyasha: I knew it you are a homo, or at least a bisexual.  
  
Sess: ( pummels jaken again ) that is not true what he said. I'm straight. All: yeah sure you are!!  
  
Disclaimer: hello. People how did you like my story? I hope it wasn't too intimate with the gay thing. I like to make fun of sesshoumaru even though he's my favorite character. Well, if I can think of anything else to put in next I'll get writing, but please review, I need to know if people like it or not.  
  
~ osuwari ~ 


	3. chapter3

Disclaimer: hello again, thank you all for reviewing, it means so much to me when I know someone likes what I write. Also as you all know I do not own inuyasha, it all belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Thanks, now lets get on with the story.  
  
Chapter3  
  
Jaken: my lord how can you deny your gay, what about all those precious things we did together?  
  
Sess: I don't know what your talking about.  
  
Jaken: my lord how can you have forgotten about all those picnics we went on?  
  
Sess: NOOOOOO!!!!  
  
Kagome: eww! Bad visions are filling my head!  
  
Sango: ahhhhh! It's sickening, say no more!  
  
Inuyasha: now that's just sick!  
  
Miroku: ooh, what happened next?  
  
All: OO  
  
Miroku: what? I wanna know what happened.  
  
Sango: are you sure your not gay also miroku?  
  
Inuyasha: yeah, I've always had my suspicions about you.  
  
Sango: like there was this time when I went to see miroku at his house, and I saw him wearing a speedo and there was this guy running out the back. 

Miroku: hey I told you we were having swimming practice.  
  
Kagome: yeah sure like that's believable.  
  
Inuyasha: what did the guy look like sango?  
  
Sango: well, I think he was wearing a baboon suit.  
  
Kagome: it has to be Naraku.  
  
Sess: oh I know naraku, he's really nice, we spent a lot of time frolicking in the fields.  
  
All: OO  
  
Inuyasha: you mean naraku is gay too?  
  
Kagome: what the hell, why is everyone turning gay on us?  
  
Sango: oh my god! Miroku, you did it with naraku?!  
  
All: EWWW!!! GROSS!!!  
  
Miroku: I couldn't help myself.  
  
Inuyasha: at least I'm not a homo.  
  
Sango: okay I don't want to hear this anymore.  
  
Kagome: lets just hear about sess's girlfriend.  
  
Jaken: what about me and my love affair with my lord?  
  
Inuyasha: I'll show you how much I care ( pulls out tetsaiga and slashes jaken )  
  
Jaken: ( is now officially dead )  
  
Sess: that's why I dumped him for rin.  
  
Rin: yeah my lord loves me!  
  
Sess: such a better mate.  
  
Sango: lets talk of other things now, I'm getting a headache.  
  
Inuyasha: all right if you are truly not a homo, then how come I never saw you with this girlfriend of yours?  
  
Sess: well, it didn't last very long...  
  
Kagome: oh, why would that be?  
  
Sango: yes, do tell.  
  
Sess: well, it was free time in kindegarten, and I was just minding my own business.  
  
Inuyasha: doing what?  
  
Sess: drawing flowers of course.   
  
Rin: was it a pink flower?  
  
Sess: yes, a beautiful pink flower.  
  
All: a pink flower!?  
  
Inuyasha: hahaha, a guy drawing flowers! you know how gay that sounds?  
  
Sess: you're mean, you say that everything I do is gay! ( starts crying yet again)  
  
Miroku: inuyasha stop making him cry, or we won't find out what happened.  
  
Inuyasha: it's so funny, it's obvious that he's gay.  
  
Kagome: inuyasha if you don't stop making him cry I'll have to use the sit command on you.  
  
Inuyasha: OO alright fine, I'll stop.  
  
Sess: I'm all better now.  
  
Sango: (whispers to kagome) sess acts like a little kid wouldn't you say?  
  
Kagome: (whispers to sango) yeah I know what you mean, kinda scary.  
  
Miroku: what are you girls talking about?  
  
Sango & kagome: nothing!  
  
Sess: I drew a pretty flower and this girl liked it so I gave it to her and she kissed me and that's the end. 

Inuyasha: you mean that's all that happened?  
  
Sess: she was my first girlfriend.  
  
Kagome: okay...  
  
Miroku: that wasn't very exciting  
  
Sango: I guess sess doesn't know the meaning of having a girlfriend.  
  
Inuyasha: you are so stupid sess, no wonder you turned gay.  
  
Sess: you called me gay again... ( he cries yet also again )  
  
Inuyasha: hahahahah!!!  
  
Kagome: inuyasha I warned you, SIT!!  
  
Disclaimer: how was that? It didn't really turn out the way I imagined it, but it still looks good. Hope you liked it, please review. I don't know if I should add on or start a new story all together. Thanks e-mail me any time if you want, I always reply. Sayounara all my loyal readers. 


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